Mattie Jackson Selecman shared a personal look at her journey through the pain of losing her husband and into renewed purpose on the latest episode of Trevor Talks. 

Mattie recently released her first book, Lemons On Friday. In this podcast conversation, she took a deep dive into the story behind it: detailing her happy childhood growing up as the daughter of country star Alan Jackson, her clothing brand NaSHEville and its work partnering with survivors of sex trafficking and her whirlwind romance with husband Ben Selecman. It was a life that got turned inside out when she lost her husband, Ben to a freak boating accident just 11 months after they were married.

In the face of such unimaginably tragedy, Mattie recalls the way that she immediately leaned on her community— and her faith. “Until life gives you lemons, you don’t know how strong your faith is,” she admits. “I decided the strongest I could be and the best way I could fight was truly to surrender it, day by day, to the Lord.”

Along with the book, Mattie wrote the song “Racing the Dark” with her dad, telling the story of someone on a similar path to her own. On Trevor Talks, she also shares what it was like to write a song with a country music hall of famer who just happens to also be her dad.

Ultimately, the surrender and humility with which she has navigated this process has led Mattie into a deeper knowledge of who God is. With her new book, she is acting on her continued conviction to turn her pain to purpose. “The only pain I couldn’t handle was pain that felt wasted,” the singer concludes. “As long as this could have purpose… I knew that I would survive.”

You can listen to the full conversation on Spotify, Apple Music and Google Podcasts. Find Lemons on Friday at lemonsonfriday.com, and keep up with Mattie on Facebook, Instagram and her own podcast She’s In The City.